Another life’s daily inspiration

Another life’s daily inspiration

Scarlett and I have found numerous life’s daily inspiration thru our hospice patients and families.

These life’s daily inspirations are priceless to us. They inspire us and teach us something every day.

The people we have had the privilege of caring for have touched our lives forever.

Hence, the genesis of our blog; we are asked over and over, “ How do you do it?”

So we have dedicated our website to answer those questions, to share our daily walk while protecting their privacy and well-being and bringing anything of inspiration to our readers.

Let us inspire you today by telling you about Thelma and James.

James was our patient. He was 91 years old and was being cared for by his 88 year old wife Thelma. They had been married for 71 years.

When Thelma was 17 years old, she and James had her parents meet them at the court house to sign papers allowing their young daughter to get married.

Thelma proclaimed she had “loved James since she was fourteen”. She noticed him right away as he was the star player for the basketball team at their school. She often spoke of his “moves” on and off the court.

Thelma had beautiful, piercing blue eyes, as did James. They both said it was love at first sight.

James was the only man she had ever been with romantically speaking.

She dedicated herself to James and their three children, Sherry, John, and Karen. Thelma was a proud homemaker, while James became a professional painter and opened his own business.

Their means were modest and their home was full of love.

When James became our hospice patient, he was already weak and frail. Thelma had to assist him to get out of the bed and then walk with him the short distance to his favorite recliner, all the while being mindful of his oxygen tubing.

James was 6 foot 3 and Thelma 5 foot. She would dress him, feed him, bathe him and give him his medicine with pride. He belonged to her, and she belonged to him; everyone knew this.

Their primary goal was to keep and care for James in their home. James wanted to pass in their “marital bed”.

Sadly one day Thelma fell in their kitchen and fractured her hip requiring surgery. She was in the hospital, then in rehab for many weeks.

James and Thelma were grieving; they had never spent a night away from each other.

Their children took turns staying with James and caring for him. They even took James to see Thelma at the hospital and then at the rehab facility as long as he could tolerate it. Sadly, the day came when James became completely bed bound.

Thelma tried to speak to James on the phone but he was so hard of hearing that it just frustrated them both.

Finally, after many weeks, Thelma got to go home.

James was her drive and strength to get better. She wanted to resume her role as Caregiver.

He still belonged to her!

Thelma was shocked and devastated to see how he had changed, now bedridden, speaking only a few words and in a whisper. The worst part for Thelma: he no longer knew who she was.

Thelma fell into great depression. No medicine could help her broken heart.

Her children then broke the news to Thelma that it was time for she and James to move in with their son John and his wife. They were the healthiest of their children and best able to care for them. They also lived two hours away.

Thelma sobbed as she was explaining to Scarlett and I. They had lived in this home for 57 years and her best friend that happened to be her sister was her neighbor. Imagine how heavy Thelma’s heart had to be!

Everything in her life was turned upside down, and she couldn’t even discuss with James; his dementia was too advanced.

For the next several weeks, as the children went thru their belongings – sorting thru the pictures, quilts, and deciding who gets what. Thelma became somewhat stronger, assuming her role of the matriarch she had once been.

She was directing orders to the children and grandchildren, as she was lovingly caring for her husband of all these years and would tell everyone “He still belongs to me ALWAYS!”

I happened to witness something so touching that I could not fight back my tears. I will never forget what I saw.

I had just walked in James bedroom. He was lying in the hospital bed. The lights were dim and all you could hear was his oxygen concentrator running.

James and Thelma’s wedding picture and bible were there on the night stand.

I then heard Thelma as she was walking in the bedroom say “He is still mine always”.

Immediately James began singing a song called ‘Always’.

Thelma looked with disbelief and began sobbing, holding James’ hand and patting his face.

She explained that James sang that song to her on their wedding day at the court house.

James passed away 2 days later; was able to pass in their bed as he wished.

Three days after James was buried, Thelma passed – also in their marital bed as she had wanted.

Scarlett and I hope you have enjoyed one of our many hospice inspirational stories.

We would really appreciate it if you would share your thoughts about Thelma and James or one of your life’s daily inspiration.

Please share  with others,

Thanks!

Elaine and Scarlett

 

What is a Life’s Daily Inspiration to YOU?

What is a Life’s Daily Inspiration to YOU?

Life’s daily inspiration to me means many different things and at different times .

Different seasons can make a change in my opinion of what a life’s daily inspiration is as well.

You know what I mean?

Think about it, we have soooo many hats to wear in 24 hours, and experts report that we have 60,OOO to 80,000 thoughts a day!

Let me repeat that, experts report that we have 60,OOO to 80,000 thoughts a day!

Is that not staggering to you? Geeez talk about overload city!

Oh it gets crazier!

Check this out. It has been researched even further, as many as 98 percent of these thoughts are exactly the same thoughts that we had the day before.

Say what??? That’s a lot of REPEAT REPEAT REPEAT INFORMATION,,,,,,,,,,

IT GETS WORSE!

Eighty percent of our thoughts are NEGATIVE and we just keep revisiting these ugly thoughts over and over! Yikes and Yikes again!

Interesting fact here, it’s across the board. Meaning regardless of age or culture we have these thoughts, it proves to be a human component. Yep we are human.

So begs the question of why ,oh why, do we have these negative thoughts? Are we never happy or grateful people?

Make it stop!

I would rather we be focusing on those positive life’s daily inspiration thoughts. Wouldn’t you?

How did this happen?

The world shrinks or expands according to one’s courage .” Anais Nin

So let’s break it down this way.

These negative thoughts will and do pop up. Period. That’s reality.

Maybe a song, an aroma, or watching a commercial can trigger a thought.

Poof there it is, you didn’t ask for it , it’s just shows up uninvited. My gosh I have had things pop up from 20 years ago.

There are many thoughts and research why we have these negative thoughts.

It ranges from self-protection, shame, guilt, fear of the unknown, and lack of control.

For the sake of this article may we focus on how to deal with this vs why ? (This will be revisited)

These are some tips that help me and I hope they help you as well.

When I have negative thoughts I remind myself that I need a brain shampoo!

I know it sounds simplistic but it helps me!

And it goes without saying Rinse, and repeat!

If you are having those darn negative thoughts, think how you would respond to a friend if he/she said those comments to you.

If you do get stuck in that negative moment and feel you must must must revisit it , put your self on a timer. Seriously ! It’s our brain. 5- 10 minutes and no more.

Do not feed the beast! It serves NO purpose.

I love the word “replace.” The definition of replace is “ take the place of”

For every negative thought , immediately replace with a positive one, multiple times!

Squash it squash it and squash it.

Sometimes if I’m in a meeting and can’t remove myself from the meeting I dance a jig in my head. Did that make you laugh? I hope so.

I dare ya to try it and please let me know if it helps. Seriously please do.

Getting back to the original question

What is a life’s Daily Inspiration to you?

Will you please take a moment to share some with us?

We would love to hear them and pass them along to others.

Elaine and Scarlett

Life’s Daily Inspiration In A Day of Mayhem!

Life’s Daily Inspiration In A Day  of Mayhem!

Life's Daily Inspiration In A Day  of Mayhem!
Life’s Daily Inspiration In A Day of Mayhem!

This mornings Life’s Daily Inspiration all started when I unlocked the door to take Fred my dog out for his morning romp at approximately 6:30 am.

Not my finest hour, although that being said it’s better than 3 am. 

So I unlocked the door and opened it and poof! On goes my security lights and  off goes the skunk on the porch. Leaving Fred and I enveloped in his obnoxious odor. This was definitely not a Life’s Daily Inspiration. So please bare with.

Yes, as I said we were dosed with horrific odor of biblical proportions.

Immediately Fred who is only six months old ran between my legs and started sneezing uncontrollably. He’s a lover not a fighter and is scared of his own shadow. He is shaking uncontrollably and wants me hold him and save him. 

I look down the ramp toward our stinky visitors Only to catch a glimpse of him as he escapes around the corner to spread his offending love elsewhere. Eek! Now what to do? Fred has to do his morning ritual so I guess that much needed shower will have to wait. 

Trust me when I tell you we stank and  that was the longest 15 minutes of my life.

It took Fred forever to find the perfect blade of grass. Of course the poor thing kept sneezing trying to rid his poor snout of all the gosh awfulness. Just when I’d think he had found the perfect spot he would move again and sneeze again and again.

While I poor sap, and the dogs walker was trying to rid my mouth of the taste of skunk. And very distasteful unpleasantness it was. My poor eyes were watering so profusely I could barely see my poor dog Fred.

And through it all I was thankful we were not sprayed full face. The screen door was between us an my front porch will smell forever.

Now if only Fred would do his thing so we could try to make this smell less horrible and offensive.

Fred finally chose his spot in the back yard. Unfortunately our skunk from the front porch had also headed around the other side toward the back yard.

I would naturally have thought he hightailed it to wherever this foul creatures live. Canada would be fine with me. Anywhere but my house. Once was more than enough for Fred and I.

But evidently not enough for old Mr. Skunk. Because there he was shaking that tail at us and we were only about 5 feet away.

Having just come around the corner to see we weren’t the only one’s present. 

There was that darned big old yellow cat that belonged to the neighbor. But, just didn’t know it! 4 feet from old Mr Skunk ready to pounce. I thought to myself in that split second! Boy, are you ever gonna be sorry. And right about then my big baby of an Australian Shepard jumped into my arms still sneezing from the last time. Wanting me to save him. Why? Because my dogs a coward .

Life's Daily Inspiration In A Day  of Mayhem!
Life’s Daily Inspiration In A Day of Mayhem!

And that  happened twice in one day.

  Then that big old yellow striped cat lost his mind and attacked that skunk.

Fred and I once again were in the wrong place at the wrong. Boy, were we in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Thankfully once again we were not directly sprayed. That D@m Yellow cat was! Justice I say. And Freds bark seconded it.

As the skunk high tailed it off to visit Canada, I hope. Maybe he will consider retirement there better yet. 

I’ve lived here over 30 years. I once had A Mother raccoon on my porch with five of the cutest baby raccoons. 

Life's Daily Inspiration In A Day  of Mayhem!
Life’s Daily Inspiration In A Day of Mayhem!

And when I open the screen door which  I am forever doing without looking first. A habit to which I feel sure I have now broken forever. After El Stinko being there.

Sorry back to my story. All of the cute little raccoons stood on their hind legs. I of course, decided they were saying ,by their actions, Don’t shoot. We were just visiting the cats food. I stayed inside and they all ambled down the ramp and left me unscathed.

But this has been an assault to me and my faithful Fred, although a coward. Hope is he will grow into a little more ferocious dog and protect me instead  of himself.

Now with the show over for the moment. I must try to rid both of us from that skunks perfume. Chanel No #5 it most definitely Was Not!

Thanks for reading our mornings adventure and please leave us a comment below.

P.S stay away from the skunk…